I wish I love that little girl much more

I don't know how to be pretty
I don't know how to be a woman
A bunch of insecurity comes and it's staying long lasting.
Sometimes bad days come up with seeing other people are achieving their success, it's not about hate them, but it's like hmm can I do that? 

Ketika bisa mencapai sesuatu yang sulit dibayangkan (re: menikah), malah ada yg tanya, "Jadi yang kaya kamu gini laku?". Maksudnya gimana nih "yang kaya kamu gini". Keur mah insecure, keur mah ada yg ngomong kaya gini, yah too hard to be positive.

Kingkong, Babi guling, gajah bengkak, telor gajah, mata sipit, bibir dower, and all of the things that I made me ever hate my self. I think I just need support system, but I never felt that I have one. Even the closest circle is one who stepped on my head.

I wish I love that little girl much more at that time.